Communicating Boundaries

On Boundaries: Part 3 (Part 1) (Part 2)

Communication

What are you observing?

What are you feeling?

What do you need?

What is your request?

  1. Actionable: You’re not providing a problem, but a solution to a situation, one that sets the other person up to win.
  2. Specific: Removing ambiguity leaves less room for misinterpretation. The requests create both clear actions and boundaries.
  3. Empowering: We’re asking for help. Providing a clear and simple way in which they can help us is often well received, because having the power to help others feels good.
  4. Requests: This frames the communication as a dialog rather than a demand. The response to these requests can be very telling in one of two ways: It can quickly expose those who are not willing to help, or keep their word. In other words, people who are not invested in maintaining the relationship. Other times, these requests can begin a dialog that surfaces information we were unaware of:

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Creator of the Bullet Journal®. NYT Best-selling author and digital product designer, living in Brooklyn, NY.

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Ryder Carroll

Creator of the Bullet Journal®. NYT Best-selling author and digital product designer, living in Brooklyn, NY.